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Feelings Box
When I was struggling with Ed, I was often numb to my emotions. But as I moved forward in recovery, I learned the importance of experiencing all my feelings—the good, the bad, and the ugly—and dealing with them appropriately rather than running to Ed.
Don’t Doubt It
When we are in recovery, no matter which stage of it, it is important to have an attitude of positivity and strength. At times it is hard to feel that inside because Ed can be so loud and hard to deal with. Also, people around you can say not so nice things and put doubt in your heads as to whether you can recover at all…and when Ed hears that he gets even louder and more convincing making you really question.
Honesty
As the holidays approached, life became hectic, and I was stressed out at work. Ed was talking to me more often, begging me to play his games. Since I was around food at holiday parties, he was moving in on my weaknesses and vulnerabilities. Sometimes I listened, but other times defied him, which showed me that I still had the will to fight him off.