I decided to have a few friends over for dinner the other night.  A few days before the dinner, one of my friends called to see what she could bring.  I told her to bring dessert.  We discussed what type and as we were chatting a dessert that I had when I was a kid was brought up.  I mentioned to her that when I was with Ed this was a dessert he told me I couldn’t have any longer. So, the dinner party night rolls around and the friend that was bringing dessert walks in and low and behold she shows up with the childhood dessert we were joking about.  I was belly laughing but excited to eat it since it had been many years.

So dessert time comes and without hesitation, I grab the old time dessert and take a seat.  As I sat there, friends were all around chatting and laughing.  No one there had any idea the feelings and rules that once harbored this dessert. I took a bite after bite and the taste was exactly as I remembered…delicious!  With each bite came memories of childhood, friends, and fun.

As I sat there eating my dessert, there were no rules, behaviors, guilt or self- judgment involved.  It was pure freedom.  After I finished, I went to the dessert tray and grabbed more delicious treats.  Each one just as yummy as the last.  Recovery has many rewards and this is one of them.

I encourage you to bring back some happy memories around the foods you enjoyed before Ed became involved.  Take that step and eat that childhood treat.  Is it something you had with friends, with family, something that grandma use to make or something you had at a cookout?  Eat that treat that Ed said was off limits.  Take your power back and show him he is not in control any longer.

I give you permission to eat and enjoy it.  Eat it with friends all around you for love and support. Enjoy each bite for each bite you take is another step down that path of recovery. You can do it and you deserve it.  Enjoy the old memories that come with it and enjoy making the new ones too.

What will be a treat you enjoy this holiday season?

With health, hope and strength,